Anxiety Attack

It starts with a rise in blood pressure.
Blood being pushed faster and faster.
I feel my veins start to pop in my forehead.
My body aches and calls for my loving bed.
My every thought is concentrated on this,
And that which is no where near bliss.
I sit down and the dog comes and sleeps on me,
This is something extraordinarily odd you see.
I start feeling so much pain at this point.
Seems a fire started at every single joint.
With my neck stiff as a 2x4 in winter
Throughout my mind, pain begins to splinter.
Brilliant reds fill my vision when I close my eyes.
Some thoughts I wish so desperately to disguise.
Laying in bed awake, I dream of a swift death.
Not dying of ever lasting failing health.
No instead a direct shot to the heart,
Or something conjured by someone smart.
Either way it's just another fantasy,
To get me through the day.  You see,
I know I'll eventually have to go back,
And figure out what brought this anxiety attack.